mental

Crazy, but C’est la Vie

by
Digital artwork of a distressed woman in three poses, with a city skyline visible through transparent blocks. She appears screaming, perplexed, and menacingly holding a knife. The sunset casts an orange glow across the scene — crazy, but C'est la Vie.

This may or may not have been influenced by music. It’s a triptych, but all in one, aka I did three different renders and then combined them – okay, technically there is one more render of the background, but who’s counting? It’s a vignette of modern life. You can extrapolate from there, right?  Yeah, the … Read more

Abandoned America

by

A digital painting for our times. The subject can be anyone in modern America, a veteran, someone with PTSD like a victim of sexual assault, someone financially ruined by medical bills or loss of a job, or a victim of mental health issues or addiction. Homelessness is not discriminatory, it can affect anyone with red blood running through their veins. The sad part is that most people will help a dog or cat out in the cold before they help their fellow man, hence the title.

I had to render this three times. Winter is a challenging thing in digital art. My first render I noticed 1.5 hours after starting it, that I forgot the effect of breathing in winter. It was a challenge to create, I ended up using a cloud with a lot of tinkering. 1.5 hours after the second render, I realized by looking at the reflection in his eyes that there needed to be a figure there to add that Je ne sais quoi, so there is an entire part of the scene you don’t see just to get that reflection. Yes, it’s a bit OCD for something that will be seen by maybe 10 people, liked by 2 🙂

Postpartum

by

Can art still shock and offend? Can it still cause questions to be asked? Can it drive a conversation? In today’s digital artwork, which for some reason just finished a four-hour rendering (maybe the rig was offended), I explore the dark side of the Romanticism movement. I’ve drawn on David Caspar Friedrich, who IMHO is the nexus of the movement, as well as adding an element of taboo. Of course, the work is dark (sunset plus phones/mobile devices make it harder to see), so pay attention to your surroundings. The point? I read an article yesterday on depression that led me down a rabbit hole, wherein I ended up in the squishy field of Postpartum Depression. Of course, as a man, it’s something I don’t have to deal with, but wanted to do a PSA foe the ladies that if you’re in that pit, you’re not alone. Get it treated before it turns into postpartum psychosis, which happened in this artwork, as all life is precious. Resources abound. SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders. 1-800-662-(HELP) 4357.

Moving On

by
A person kneels on the floor in a dimly lit hallway, staring straight ahead. The environment is dark, with muted colors and a single framed photo hanging on the wall in the background. The mood appears tense and eerie, as if they are struggling to find the strength for moving on.

Let’s entertain for a moment that someday, I will paint well enough to earn a spot in the Met; even if it’s in the restrooms.  When curators look at my body of work, they will see that my realism paintings tend to be utilitarian and dark.  They will dissect my state of mind during the creation of the painting and find things with which to create parallels.

Take ‘Moving On’, my latest, as an example.  They’ll say there’s a certain eerie loneliness about it.  References and connections will be made to social issues and mental illness.  They’ll wonder why I’ve painted Vermeer’s ‘Woman Holding a Balance’ as the only thing hanging on the wall, really the only detailed object.  The relative emptiness of the rest of the scene stands in stark contrast to the focused area.

If I had to make up a backstory as to the inspiration, I’d say the painting is about ending one journey and beginning another.  In this case, the woman is moving out; from a failed relationship, or something else – it’s all in the viewer’s mind.

There is irony in the fact I stopped work on it today, March 11, 2017, which would have been the two year anniversary of my last relationship – A wonderful woman, she dodged a bullet. I wish her the best.

But the painting is not really about any of this.  Realism is boring, tedious work. I like rapid, flowing strokes and not contained or restrained lines.  I want the brush to dance on the canvas, which is why I got bored and decided to go back to abstract acrylics.

Moving On

2017. 16×20, acrylic on canvas.

Available for purchase here:

Etsy: Moving On